There are times in our lives when nobody should mess with us. We’re from Texas and nobody messes with Texas. Furthermore, they should not mess with a former junior high teacher … who has heard it all … and knows within seconds when someone is telling the truth
Last month, I received a bill from Direct TV. I tried to call, but only got as far as the little voice which kept asking me how I wanted to pay. I didn’t want to pay at all. I wanted them to straighten out their business and stay out of my mailbox.
It had been months since I changed my television provider. It was about the same time that I got rid of my land-line, my slow internet connection, and clipped the dog’s nails. I need to clip them again, so I know that it’s been a while
I did remember sending back all the equipment and the setting up of the new system which is attached to my “smart” television and the fast internet which speeds along the movies which I download through my “fast,” new internet. Sometimes I can’t remember if my television comes from a cable, like my internet, or from a satellite dish on my roof. I could have gone outside and looked, but they should have records of the switch. Even if they are in outer Pakistan with a generator and three yaks, they know.
It was Sunday afternoon. I’d watched the required part of a football game to maintain my relationship with my “fella.” So, when I noticed the Direct TV bill on the table, I decided to forgo my nap and get those people straightened out.
After several attempts, a real person (aged 14 and a quarter) came on the line. Sweet as pie, she assured me she could help. I went through the fact that I didn’t owe any money. I had dropped Direct TV several months ago, and they were mistakenly sending me a bill … two in fact. “I remember boxing up your receivers …” Blah blah blah blah. It got very quiet.
“Let’s see, you signed up in May of 2016.”
“Oh, no,” I corrected. “I dropped you in May of 2016. Someone must have made a mistake and given me a second account.” We went through my name, rank and serial number … twice. “Let me put you in contact with our “loyalty department.” She did. Again, I explained. Dead silence.
She told me to hold the line until her supervisor could look things over. For almost twenty minutes, I watched a movie on my “smart” television while she sent messages to the supervisor who must have gone to lunch. Periodically, she reminded me she was still on the line.
I was bored. I wanted to get this over with. I dug in the drawer beside my desk for an old bill from AT&T from whom I had previously contracted my television service. It said ATT/Dish at the top. I remembered AT&T had purchased a new television service and they had encouraged me to change. Must be a new bill.
The woman was still there when the movie ended, and I went in to get the remote control to change the channel. That’s when I noticed that the remote said Direct TV. I whirled and looked at the box under the “smart” television. That also said Direct TV.
I crawled into the office, picked up the phone and explained to the woman that I was wrong. I’d switched from Dish back in May of 2016 and did in fact owe her $151.42 … if not more. I assured her I would be sending her a check that day. Sometimes on a Sunday afternoon, you should just go ahead and take a nap.
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